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  • Lynn Saternow

    saternow, lynn 2010
August 28, 2010

Tougher security might make robbers think twice

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Here are some thoughts from a guy who wonders how the heck you can rob a bank by threatening someone with a knife:

Now I realize that the important thing that most banks tell their employees is that if threatened, you give a robber the money. Obviously, you never want to see anybody get hurt.

I can see that kind of thinking with a gun or a note saying he has a gun or bomb. But a knife? From the other side of a counter?

That was my first thought when I heard that’s what happened in a robbery at PNC bank in Sharpsville this week. It’s only a couple of blocks from the police station. What would the guy do if he asked for money and you told him no and ran while dialing 9-1-1?

Do any banks have Mace or Tasers on hand for employee protection?

Just wondering.

I’ve always thought that every bank should have “robber security doors.” There would be  outside doors, a small entrance, then inside doors. So if you are robbed, as soon as the criminal goes through the first doors you push a button that locks the outside doors, and then the inside doors immediately slam shut, trapping the robber between bullet-proof glass doors.

A really nice touch would be to release poisonous gas into the chamber although the courts just might rule it would be violating the criminal’s civil rights.

Then again, the expense might make it cheaper to give the robber the money. But not as much fun.

Actually, people steal from banks all the time. They simply take out a credit card, run up the totals and don’t pay it off. And you don’t need a knife.

Of course the rest of us eventually pay for it.

ä Have you ever heard of anything worse than that situation in Chile where 33 miners are trapped underground? Rescuers are digging an escape tunnel, but the miners are being told they need to trim their waists to 35 inches to fit through the hole.

Considering the obesity problem we have in this country, that would be difficult here. But I would think those people are in better shape.

But the worst thing is that they haven’t given the miners the really bad news — they may be stuck there for up to four months. Four MONTHS!

The health minister is encouraging the miners to sing, record songs and make videos. Good times!



I know the title of the first song I would write to that health minister: “Get Me the Heck Out of Here You #@&%%!!R*&*(### Idiot!”



The Herald’s Lynn Saternow writes this column each Saturday for The Opinion page. He can be reached at lsaternow@sharonherald.com

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