By Matt Snyder
MERCER COUNTY — While same-sex custody cases are rare in Mercer County, Lisa Lewis is not the first non-biological parent in the county to seek custody of a child she helped raise.
Former longtime Common Pleas Judge Michael J. Wherry said he never had a same-sex custody case since he began his legal career in the county as a public defender in 1967.
He has, however, seen a number of cases where non-biological parents seek an “in loco parentis” status for visitation or custody reasons. He said those cases came up maybe five times every seven or eight years.
He said a same-sex case is handled the same: If someone has in loco parentis standing and it’s in the interests of the child, they get some measure of custody.
He said it’s not necessarily a complex or difficult case once in loco parentis is established. After that, it just becomes a case of what is best for the child.
Wherry did say the two years that Ms. Lewis’ custody battle has stretched is unusual. Five out of 100 cases might go longer than six months, he said. Most are settled before or after just one custody hearing.
But the case has stretched out mostly due to mandatory limits on how long a custody case can proceed. The hearings have consistently been pushed back further than the 180-day maximum under law, causing Ms. Lewis to refile her case twice. Each time, she has had to re-establish in loco parentis standing.
Ms. Lewis believes if she were a man, she’d have access to the child’s medical records and her status at school. She also thinks the case wouldn’t have dragged on so long without her getting to see the child.
“You don’t hear about this, but I’m sure there are other gay and lesbian people who are going through this,” Ms. Lewis said.
Pennsylvania does not provide for gay marriage or civil unions, but Ms. Lewis said she didn’t know if they would have gone that route if she and Jeannette Rowan had the opportunity.
Ellen Kahn, spokeswoman for the gay rights group Human Rights Campaign, said there is a patchwork of state laws that allow non-biological parents to legally adopt their partner’s child.
“It is in the best interest of the child, and the family as a whole, for the non-bio mom to do a second-parent adoption,” Ms. Kahn said.
Such adoptions provide the non-biological parent legal rights. Some couples do not seek these because of limited finances, a lack of knowledge or because they don’t think it’s required, Ms. Kahn said.
Pennsylvania allows for such adoptions and does not explicitly limit gay couples from adopting children, according to the HRC’s Web site.
Ms. Kahn also said parents shouldn’t “play the bio card” when relationships dissolve, using their legal status to keep an ex from the child.
“It is not in the best interest of the child, and only in a case where the parent has done something to hurt a child should this ever be undertaken,” she said.
“Because we do not have legal marriage –- which provides framework for legal divorce –- and because we may not have access to second-parent adoption, individuals take some liberty outside of what is legal and fair, and ultimately the children pay the price,” she said.
